Sometimes It
The Feedback Myth
Career advice loves to tell you to "embrace feedback" and "be coachable." And yes — genuine, specific, well-intentioned feedback is invaluable for growth. But not all feedback is created equal.
Some feedback is vague ("you need to be more strategic"). Some is biased (research shows women and people of color receive more subjective, personality-based feedback than their peers). And some is just wrong — based on incomplete information or a manager's bad day.
Knowing the difference is a career skill.
How to Evaluate Feedback
Is it specific? Good feedback points to observable behaviors and outcomes. "Your presentation didn't address the client's budget concerns" is useful. "You need to be more polished" is not.
Is it actionable? If you can't identify a concrete next step from the feedback, it's too vague to be useful. Ask for specifics.
Is there a pattern? If multiple people give you similar feedback, pay attention. If one person has an issue that nobody else has raised, consider the source.
Is it about your work or your identity? Feedback about your deliverables is legitimate. Feedback about your personality, communication style, or "fit" — especially if you're from an underrepresented group — deserves more scrutiny.
How to Respond to Poor Feedback
Ask clarifying questions. "Can you give me a specific example?" forces vague feedback into the open. If they can't provide one, that tells you something.
Separate the signal from the noise. Even poor feedback sometimes contains a kernel of truth. Extract what's useful and discard the rest.
Document it. If you're receiving consistently unfair or biased feedback, keep a record. This protects you and gives you data for escalation if needed.
Don't internalize it. Bad feedback can shake your confidence if you let it. Remember: feedback says as much about the giver as it does about you.
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